I've found the sexual Fountain of
Youth. The Spanish conquistador Juan Ponce de León (1474-1521) might
have gone looking for this mythical place as a side project in
Florida --even though he was probably more obsessed with finding
gold-- but the magic elixir is neither a place nor a liquid. It's an
unconventional food: citrus peel.
We talked about dick-friendly foods
before in the post The Time's Always Right for Nature's Viagra.
Almonds, celery, bananas, avocados, and watermelons are good for
guys, but if you want to fuck fast and hard until your dying day, eat
some peel of limes, lemons, oranges, tangelos, tangerines, and/or
grapefruits.
How does it work? Eating citrus peel
reverses arteriosclerosis, or hardening of the arteries. Plaque
buildup in blood vessels actually starts in boys on high fat diets,
but it doesn't usually affect their health until well into adulthood.
Why is this important? Well, the
quality of your hard-ons reflect your circulatory condition. Good,
rock hard erections depend on having normal blood pressure. The dick
is literally a barometer of a guy's overall health.
In my sex life, I'd never given much
thought to the influence of diet. I'd never had any problems. Then, I
started needing more time to get aroused, and my erections weren't
quite as strong. I could still stick it in my boyfriend, but this
weakening bothered me.
I had my blood pressure taken, and sure
enough, I had prehypertension. It was officially above normal. I
wasn't having that. I still wanted to feel young. I still wanted to
fuck like I always had before.
All my life, I'd heard that citrus peel
reversed arteriosclerosis, but I'd never tried it. I bought some
oranges, and washed them with soap, since fruits are manhandled by
every grower, distributor, and grocer in Creation. Then, I started
eating a half orange, including the peel, every morning.
At first, nothing happened, but as
months went by, my dick returned to its teenager state. I was getting
woodies at more inappropriate times again. Sure, thinking about hot
guys or driving over bumps in the road made me hard, but sometimes
I'd get an erection for no reason at all --as if I was 13 again.
Of course, I knew my cock was really
healthy, when I started precuming again, while watching porn or
writing this blog. Limp or hard, my johnson is back to being a
regular fountain, when I think about sex. (I have to put a sock on it
to keep my pants dry.)
My boyfriend asked me if I was taking
something. My dick would go from zero to 60 in no time, and my
renewed confidence made me hornier. I was having us flip fuck each
other more often. We're proudly versatile.
Of course, to enjoy the maximum boner
effect of citrus peel, you should do cardio exercise regularly. This
is the magic combination. With clear arteries and good physical
conditioning, you'll be ready to fuck anytime, anywhere. Keep your
body clean: no smoking and no substance abuse.
To prove to myself that citrus peel was
not just an old wives' tale, I had my blood pressure taken again, and
it was normal. I also took a blood test, and all signs were healthy.
It worked! I was officially a young motherfucker again. I started
noticing other benefits. I could see better, hear better, my skin
looked better, and my teeth were brighter. Many say I look younger now.
Citrus peel is not for the
fainthearted. The citric acid can burn the absolute shit out of your
mouth. If you have asbestos lips, well no problem, man, but if not, I
find tangelos and tangerines to be milder. Also, drinking tea or
eating a banana afterward can neutralize the acid. You can even mix
the peel in a blender with your favorite food or drink. (Caution:
Citrus and dairy products don't mix.)
What if your stomach isn't made of
iron? I eat citrus peel every weekday morning, and on the weekends, I
give my body a break. Experiment. Find the balance that works for
you.
Are there milder alternatives to citrus
peel? We mentioned almonds, celery, bananas, avocados, and
watermelons, and they work pretty well. I've even heard guys rave
about parsley and beets. (Beets? Gag!) Ginseng can make you sick.
Garlic works, but no one will want to kiss you. Chocolate is
beneficial, but it makes you fat. Red wine only helps non-alcoholics.
Broiled fish and chicken are good for dick health, but they take a
while to work.
There may be other mild options, but
nothing packs a punch like citrus peel. Why? Other foods relax your
blood vessels, but citrus peel actually cleans them out. When I eat it, I can
almost feel it running through my circulation system. It gives me a
little high. Above all, it makes me feel like a real man. I know I'm
doing my dick --and my boyfriend-- the biggest favor.
The drug companies aren't going to like
this. Who needs Viagra, Cialis, and Levitra, when there's a natural
alternative? Citrus peel doesn't mask impotence; it cures it. Why it
can even combat prostate enlargement. No Flomax needed here. Peel can
keep you pissing good and strong.
Combating arteriosclerosis with citrus
peel has been part of folk medicine for ages, and the link between
circulatory health and strong, frequent boners isn't rocket science.
(Well, actually, in a way, it is.) The important thing is to just do
it. Eat peel and exercise. Enjoy getting harder. Fuck well, my
friend.
Photo Credits:
Hot Boy Showering 1 -- Colton Burnett by Don Elmore;
Juan Ponce de León 2 -- Seventeenth Century Spanish
Engraving;
Guy Holding Lemon 3 -- Unknown origin;
Gym Sex 4 -- Stu fucks Porter for Sean Cody;
Sitting Stiffy 5 -- Cole gets hard for Fratmen;
Wall Chubby 6 -- Todd Morgan by Ryan Boyd;
Beach Streak 7 -- Vicente by Mark Leighton;
Kitchen Nude 8 -- Matt gets naked for Chaos Men;
Watermelon Sausage Party 9 -- Unknown origin;
Stand and Deliver Position 10 -- Glenn fucks Pavel for
Sean Cody.